Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Texas Chainsaw 3D (2013)

Is there really a reason for making Texas Chainsaw sequels anymore?  Apparently, Platinum Dunes abandoned the series after The Beginning but Twisted Pictures felt it was a great idea to pick it back up again.  I mean, there never really is a shortage of hot girls and their dumbass looking boyfriends willing to poke their noses where they shouldn't be, right?  Of course, Scream Queen is a sucker for both formulaic sequels, and Bill Moseley (who plays Drayton Sawyer in this version for like 5 minutes).  They also brought back a few other actors from the original TCM, including Marilyn Burns (Sally Hardesty), Gunnar Hansen (original Leatherface), and John Dugan (Grandpa).

So what's the shtick this time?  We get a bunch of archive footage from the original movie, and then a whole story of vigilante justice, where Leatherface's house is burned to the ground, along with everyone in it.  In a NOES-esque twist, this now becomes the town's dirty little secret.   In a Halloween-esque twist, we find out that someone was abducted as a baby from fire, and raised as if they weren't related to Leatherface.

Back to present times.  Some hot twenty-somethings, including Trey Songz (Ryan) are going to New Orleans to party it up.  However, Heather (Alexandra Daddario) randomly gets notified that her grandmother died, and since she is the only living relative, she gets a free house.  BOOM!  She didn't even know she had a grandma.  It's her lucky day.  Heather, Ryan, and their two friends pile into the car and swing on down to Texas to claim the house.  They also pick up a hitchhiker because people totally still do that.

The house is bananas and full of expensive stuff and vintage wine.  What could go wrong?  Oh yeah, just Leatherface all old and living in the basement.  Like an unruly pet, apparently he just needs to be contained and fed.   Who knew it was that easy?  Heather did, that's who.  She goes from being a fairly normal chick that makes strange art, to someone that is super-attached to their crazy, murderous family, even encouraging Leatherface to kill the townspeople who still resent him (I wonder why!) 

I actually enjoyed the gore and ridiculousness of most of this flick, but the ending and the Heather character was just so stupid and contrived.  Who just goes from living a totally typical life to egging on a demented murderer and then moving in with him?  I can suspend reality a little for horror movies, but this plot line was just too much.  I hope this is the last of the TCM sequels for a while.