Saturday, August 4, 2012

Hood of Horror (2006)

This movie has been lingering on my Netflix queue, and curiosity finally got the best of me.  Also, Danny Trejo and Diamond Dallas Page!  This starts out with a weird cartoon, which almost made turn it off because I was in no mood for animation.  The animation explains that Devon (Snoop Dogg) sold his soul to a demon in order to bring his dead sister back to life.  He then becomes a "hound of hell," able to decide who goes to heaven or hell.  Then he basically narrates this trilogy with half-dressed sort-of vampires following him around.

The first installment is Crossed Out, about a female tagger, Posie (Daniella Alonso) who can kill her enemies by spray painting over their tags. She gets this ability from "Derelict," played by a very homeless-looking Danny Trejo. The deaths are pretty sweet -- one guy shoots himself in the dick, another gets impaled by a 40, and yet another gets strangled by a pay phone cord.  But she abuses her new found power and it is revoked by Derelict.

The next episode is The Scumlord.  A white trash couple want an inheritance, but in order to get it, they need to live with the husband's deceased father's old war buddies with a year in order to build character.  But they have no intentions of being nice to these people, and right away put them to work moving out of their rooms, and making them into a giant suite for the couple.  But the more they are pushed, the vets plan to exact their revenge.

The third and final portion is Rapsody Askew, about a rapper named SOD (Pooch Hall).  Snoop called in all his favors on this one, and we see Aries Spears, Lamar Odom (of course he wasn't Mr. Kardashian then), Method Man, Jason Alexander, and Diamond Dallas Page.  Also, Lin Shaye!  LoL.   Basically Lin Shaye accosts SOD and makes him relive the people he's fucked over to rise to fame.  Revenge ensues.

I wanted to like this movie because it was something different, and it involved some really cool actors/actresses.  But it was just borrrrinnngg.  And I just don't get what the point of the whole thing was.  And Snoop Dogg's character just really kind of made no sense.  I understand I wasn't to expect a life changing movie, but I didn't even chuckle once.