Wednesday, December 30, 2009

The Blackwater Valley Exorcism

I got this movie assuming it would be a direct ripoff of The Exorcism of Emily Rose. I hated that freakin' movie, so I don't know what compelled me to put this in my queue. When I watch low-budget horror flicks, I always watch the trailers that are on them. I suspect that's where I unearthed this gem.

So I'm hoping that this particular exorcism movie is without that super-creepy scene where Emily Rose is all distorted in her dorm room. That shit seriously gave me the willies and that movie was not even scary. Anyway, I digress.

This movie starts with some freaky chick in the woods, clad in a nightgown, having killed and eaten a woodland creature. Some people (apparently relatives or friends) find her, and guide her back to her house and parents. Surprise, surprise, she's possessed. She speaks in a man's voice, beats up her mom, slices herself all up, and accuses her dad of molestation.

So they strap this crazy chick (Isabelle) to the bed and try to find someone to cure her.  They first try their handyman, who was a priest in Mexico or somesuch thing.  Dude seems seriously freaked out about having to deal with this and I'm going to imagine he doesn't get paid enough for this nonsense.  They even bring in a veteranarian (hahaha) to give her some horse tranquilizers, but even that is not enough to keep this psycho bitch from going all Reagan on everyone.
Finally, they bring in the town priest and that's where this movie pretty much turns into Days of Our Lives with a low budget demon make-up job.  Apparently, (I don't have this entirely straight though) the priest used to date Isabelle's sister and also abused her (?)  In addition, he fooled around with Isabelle which somehow has resulted in her being possessed.

I expected this movie to be pretty corny, but it was honestly even worse than I imagined.  Over dramatized acting, rip-off of every exorcism movie made, and stupid soap opera plot.  Skip it.


Unknown said...

Thanks Scream Queen, I'll leave this one on the shelf